Lessons Of A Single Woman: Calling All Kindred Spirits…

I don’t ask the universe to send me just anybody & I don’t pray for somebody. I pray for the RIGHT man to find me, coming into my life with a relationship with God being his #1 priority. 

Being single is a privilege that I choose to accept. At this time, God is still working on me and guiding me to my destiny. I’m not at the place I need to be but I know I have the potential to be where I want to be. It’s through taking time to be one with myself that I’m learning who I am and what it is I truly want in life. 

I’m a Libra and we “LOVE” love. We adore everything about connecting with someone, being in love, spending unlimited time with them, and giving our ENTIRE heart to them! 

However, I’ve learned that there’s many wolves in sheep’s clothing. I refuse to keep being in relationships that aren’t going anywhere. Time is not promised to any one of us and it’s such a precious thing to waste on dead people / dead situations.  

I take pride in staying single and remaining in my journey of getting to know myself and my God. It’s through this process that I’ve learned to love myself again and to always put myself first. I spent the majority of the beginning of my life putting everyone else’s feelings, thoughts and hearts first. Yet as I was giving my all to them, I was losing myself.

I was being torn down by worry stressing about if I was good enough, how could I stop them from cheating / cheating again, how could I get them to love me more, spend more time with me, etc. These problems chewed me up inside. None of my worries caused that person to treat me any better than they would’ve had I not worried. They cheated, lied, abused, raped, were careless and disregarded my feelings nonetheless. 

Everything happens for a reason. I learned that I wasn’t the problem. The problems were my thinking and my choosing to keep being in bad situations because I hated being alone. But there’s nothing worse than being alone in a relationship and many times, that’s exactly how I felt. Alone. 

They say the route to insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. In order to change my love life, I had to change my approach. The first thing to do was to eliminate the problems altogether by becoming single. Then I could begin the process of finding, understanding, knowing and loving myself. 

Many times we think we know how to love by the way we love ourselves or our parents. But true love comes at a price that many aren’t willing to pay. In order to love, one must be ready to sacrifice. It was a hard pill to swallow but I had to learn that if I truly wanted the love my heart so desired and longed for, I had to sacrifice my ambitious knack for wanting to be loved. 

I had to learn that I was enough! You can’t find that out by chasing after someone else. You find that out by loving yourself and putting yourself first. You must take a moment to just be alone. Be single and heal focusing solely on your inner soul, health, wellness, happiness, passions and goals. Building love inside must be the priority before seeking love outside. 

Though I’ve been hurt by the wrong guys in the past, I still pray & have faith that the RIGHT MAN FOR ME will find me. Until then, I will remain diligent in focusing on my writing, my faith, my heart, my healing, my health, my wellness, happiness and my love for myself. My future husband will arrive; it’s just all in God’s time!


(Instagram: @AndreaGees

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